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Mask.I dont know why It happensOr why I hide in fearIt feels like im a cowardAnd my time is drawing nearThe harsh words that escapeWith a hint of cold un-careCovering my true intentEmotions in a scareEven though I look composedThe reality it seemsIs that Im simply good at hidingWhat I dont want to be seenThis includes the hurt i feelwhen you make a mean remarkeven though you say youre jokingstill my sunny day turns darkBecause sticks and stones wont hurt meas long as words will dotheres no need to resort to violencewhen the words will get it throughand long after knives had stabbedyou wont be able to tellthat you cut me down to sizeone fair swoop and then I fellFor my armor made of pridestarts to crumble and dis-patchas i finally slide out frommy sarcastic outer mask.
Anger.I AM ANGRY.I'm angry because I don't love youI can'tI won'tI'm not going to become weakover something so trivial.I'm angry because You're still my friendBut you're the earthand i'm the moonforever stuck revolvingaround your suffocating atmosphere.I'm angry because I can't say noeven when I need toeven when I shouldand it kills me to knowthat i'm weak like that.I'm angry because I hate everythingand i know i shouldn'tI should be happyBut nothing can satisfythis frustrating feeling inside.I'm angry because all I want to doIs make someone hurtIs feel them flinch in painThe wall is not enough this time(It can't scream with pain and plead for mercy.)I'm ANGRY because..I have no one to talk to... I have no one who can hold my hand while I say I'm not okay... I need to vent.But I can't.It's just building upand I can't say a word.Because no one's here.all I can do is cry.
Letter.It's still sitting hereMy lettercarefully sealed tight (with love)postage stamp in the corner, as always.It's waitingwatchingKnowing that the message it containscould change the course of everythingQuestioning meAs to why it has not been mailed.Why was it not hurriedly stuffed in the mailboxand sent on its way,an aura of excitement etched in its papery fibers?It was because I had waited.I had waited until the dark thoughts came(The ones that make you regret everything you've done)And they had planted the doubting seedin my head.They had whisperedwith their soundless voicesthat maybe... (He wasn't who I thought him to be) perhaps...